Dr. Sylvia Gindy, PsyD
Licensed Clinical Psychologist
Tal Gershon, LMHC
Mental Health Counselor
Valerie Graf, LMSW
Licensed Master Social Worker
Flor Villagrán, LMHC
Mental Health Counselor
Adeyemi Aladenika, LMHC
Mental Health Counselor
Here are some signs that you may need a dating therapist to help you find the right romantic partner:
- You struggle with anxiety or fear around dating and forming relationships.
- You have a history of trauma or abuse that impacts your ability to trust others and form healthy attachments.
- You have difficulty communicating your needs and setting boundaries in relationships. (Or, maybe you don’t even know what boundaries are!)
- You struggle with low self-esteem or low self-confidence, making it hard to approach potential partners or feel worthy of love and affection. Or, this may cause you to attract unhealthy partners and develop imbalanced relationships where you feel powerless.
- You continually feel powerless in your relationships or suffer from patterns of codependency, people-pleasing, and putting your own needs aside for others in relationships.
- You continually feel dissatisfied with the partners you choose.
- You continually choose partners that are avoidant, inconsistent, or unstable.
- You struggle with emotional or physical intimacy (or you’ve been told that you struggle with intimacy). Therefore, you struggle to connect with potential partners on a deeper and more authentic level.
- Your past relationships have ended poorly, either due to infidelity, betrayal, or other toxic behaviors from your partner.
- You continue ending up in toxic relationships despite efforts to break these cycles and make healthier choices for yourself.
Our expert dating therapists and relationship counselors will help you identify patterns in your behavior and beliefs that may be contributing to these challenges – amongst many others. Using the best and most effective evidence-based modalities, we will provide guidance and support as you work towards building more fulfilling relationships based on mutual respect, trust, and communication.
Expert
Dating Therapist
in NYC
Expert Dating Therapist in NYC
Navigating New York City’s dating scene can feel downright nerve-racking, especially if you struggle to form or maintain meaningful relationships. With so much pressure to find “the one” in New York City’s astronomical dating pool, it makes sense that you might feel discouraged (or even baffled) while searching for your soulmate in the Big Apple.
We get it. Dating sucks sometimes. As NYC’s renowned romantic dating therapists, we understand the unique challenges that accompany involuntary singlehood in this fast-paced city. But you don’t need to feel stuck. At Looking Glass NYC, we help you navigate your own mind – and New York’s overwhelming dating scene – with confidence, ease, and intention. This way, you can build confidence and achieve the dating life of YOUR dreams.
Whether you’re struggling with communication issues, trust barriers, past trauma, mental illnesses, low self-confidence, or simply don’t know where to begin, Looking Glass NYC will provide you with the support and guidance necessary to build meaningful connections and find lasting love in the city that never sleeps.
Common Dating Life Challenges
People face a unique set of challenges when it comes to dating. Here are some common factors that can impact dating life or
make it harder:
- Mental illness: Before you are able to love someone else and form a healthy relationship with your partner, it’s important to address your own mental health concerns and prioritize your own mental health first. Struggling with mental health issues such as depression, anxiety, or bipolar disorder can sometimes make it challenging to form and maintain relationships. But mental illness does not need to prevent you from developing a happy, meaningful relationship. Mental illness does not need to define you; learning about your uniqueness as an individual will only empower you to navigate your life from a wiser point of view (and attract someone who is excited to navigate life alongside you)!
- Past trauma: Experiencing past relationship trauma such as abuse, neglect, or abandonment can make it difficult for you to trust others and form healthy attachments. Whether your trauma may have developed during childhood or as a result of your past relationship, trauma has insidious ways of preventing you from unlocking true love in your present life. Why not start your dating endeavor with a clean slate? Counseling can help you identify and work through trauma – at your pace. This way, you can open your heart adequately to attract the partner of your dreams.
- Communication issues: Difficulty expressing oneself or understanding others’ needs and emotions can lead to misunderstandings and conflicts in relationships.
- Low self-esteem: Having low self-worth and low self-esteem can lead to a lack of confidence in social situations, making it harder to approach potential partners or feel worthy of love and affection. Low self-esteem can also make it difficult for you to set boundaries and ask for what you deserve from a partner.
- Attachment style: Attachment styles are patterns of behavior and thought that people develop in childhood based on their relationships with caregivers. There are four main attachment styles: secure, anxious-preoccupied, dismissive-avoidant, and fearful-avoidant. Individuals without secure attachment styles may struggle with intimacy and have difficulty forming close relationships. By helping you determine your attachment style (or styles), and then helping you develop secure attachment, you’ll be able to attract healthy love into your life.
- Cultural differences: Different cultural backgrounds or values can create challenges in understanding each other’s perspectives and expectations within a relationship.
- Lifestyle differences: Differences in lifestyle choices such as diet, exercise habits, or religious beliefs can create conflicts in a relationship if not addressed openly and respectfully.
- Technology use: Over-reliance on technology for communication and connection can lead to a lack of face-to-face interaction and emotional intimacy within relationships. Additionally, there is an expectation that everyone should be constantly available and responsive, which can be overwhelming for those who value their privacy or need time alone.
- Dating apps: Another challenge that people face when dating nowadays is the prevalence of dating apps and online dating. While these platforms have made it easier than ever to meet new people, they also come with their own set of issues. For example, there is a culture of casual hookups and ghosting that has emerged, making it difficult for many millennials to form meaningful connections.
- Career life: Career life can often get in the way of dating or your current relationship, especially in today’s fast-paced and demanding work culture. Long hours, high stress levels, and a constant need to be connected can leave little time or energy for building relationships. The pressure to succeed professionally can also make it difficult to prioritize personal life and create a healthy work-life balance. Additionally, job-related travel or relocation can disrupt existing relationships or make it challenging to form new ones. All of these factors can contribute to feelings of loneliness, isolation, and frustration when it comes to dating. It’s important for individuals who are struggling with this issue to recognize the impact that their career is having on their personal life and take steps towards creating boundaries, setting priorities, and seeking support as needed.
- Evolving gender roles: Finally, everyone (especially millennials) are navigating a world where traditional gender roles are being challenged and redefined. This can lead to confusion around expectations in romantic relationships, particularly around communication and emotional labor. Many millennials are seeking partners who share their values around equality and mutual respect but may struggle to find these qualities in potential partners.
Overall, dating challenges for millennials – and most New Yorkers – are complex and multifaceted. By working with a dating therapist or coach, you can gain clarity around your goals and values for relationships and develop strategies for navigating these challenges with confidence and resilience.
In a hectic and distracted world, therapy is a chance to sit with your thoughts, uncover the root of your problems, and learn how to build trusting relationships. And with the experienced support of an outside voice, you gain an ally to help you unlock what you think, understand how you feel, and better communicate with your partner.
Therapy is a relaxed, judgment-free space to develop practical tools to better handle your relationship—on your timeline. You’re able to deconstruct your current life, learn how to build trusting relationships through science-supported modalities, and confidently advance forward from a sturdier foundation.
At Looking Glass NYC, we tailor our therapy to you and your aspirations, listen to you with open ears, and draw from our extensive experience in evidence-based techniques to create your unique plan.
- Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy (CBT).
- Stress Management
- Acceptance and Commitment Therapy
- Interpersonal Therapy
- Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT).
- Exposure Therapies
- Trauma-Informed Therapies
We collaborate with you to set measurable goals and achieve tangible results. You lead the path. We help you see what you’ve missed along the way—and the opportunities in front of you.
If you’re interested in constructing an individualized plan to improve your connections and develop meaningful relationships, schedule a complimentary consultation with us now.
It’s essential to keep in mind that, when beginning any type of therapy at Looking Glass NYC, we customize our treatment approach to fit your needs, goals, and aspirations. Each person’s therapeutic journey is unique and therefore looks different than the next. This being said, our process to relationship counseling will generally contain three primary chapters:
- Step 1: Exploratory session(s). The process of relationship counseling typically begins with an exploratory session, where you will meet with your Looking Glass NYC therapist to discuss your concerns and goals. During this initial meeting, your therapist will take a holistic approach to assess your current lifestyle and state of mind. This might include asking questions about your relationship history, communication styles, and any challenges or conflict you may be currently experiencing. This is also an opportunity for you to ask questions about the therapy process and get a better sense of what to expect moving forward.
- Step 2: Treatment plan of action. Based on this information, your therapist will work with you to develop a treatment plan that fits your goals and personal needs. This may involve choosing the right therapy types, options, and techniques that are best suited for your specific situation. For example, if you are struggling with communication issues in your relationships, the therapist may recommend individual therapy sessions revolving around improving your communication skills.
- Step 3: Active treatment and lifestyle optimization. Once a treatment plan has been developed, it’s time to execute a plan of action to help you achieve your goals. This may involve attending regular therapy sessions either individually or as a couple, practicing new skills learned in therapy outside of sessions, and making changes to behaviors or thought patterns that are negatively impacting your relationship.
As we continue to work together, it may be necessary to revisit the exploratory aspect of treatment, especially if you decide you may need some different approaches to achieve your goals.
Throughout the process of relationship counseling, it’s also critical to remember that progress takes time and effort. It’s also important to stay committed to the process even when faced with setbacks or challenges along the way. With dedication and support from your qualified dating therapist at Looking Glass NYC, many individuals (and couples) are able to overcome their challenges and build stronger relationships based on mutual respect, trust, open communication, and, of course, fun!
It’s essential to keep in mind that, when beginning any type of therapy at Looking Glass NYC, we customize our treatment approach to fit your needs, goals, and aspirations. Each person’s therapeutic journey is unique and therefore looks different than the next. This being said, our process to relationship counseling will generally contain three primary chapters:
- Step 1: Exploratory session(s). The process of relationship counseling typically begins with an exploratory session, where you will meet with your Looking Glass NYC therapist to discuss your concerns and goals. During this initial meeting, your therapist will take a holistic approach to assess your current lifestyle and state of mind. This might include asking questions about your relationship history, communication styles, and any challenges or conflict you may be currently experiencing. This is also an opportunity for you to ask questions about the therapy process and get a better sense of what to expect moving forward.
- Step 2: Treatment plan of action. Based on this information, your therapist will work with you to develop a treatment plan that fits your goals and personal needs. This may involve choosing the right therapy types, options, and techniques that are best suited for your specific situation. For example, if you are struggling with communication issues in your relationships, the therapist may recommend individual therapy sessions revolving around improving your communication skills.
- Step 3: Active treatment and lifestyle optimization. Once a treatment plan has been developed, it’s time to execute a plan of action to help you achieve your goals. This may involve attending regular therapy sessions either individually or as a couple, practicing new skills learned in therapy outside of sessions, and making changes to behaviors or thought patterns that are negatively impacting your relationship.As we continue to work together, it may be necessary to revisit the exploratory aspect of treatment, especially if you decide you may need some different approaches to achieve your goals.Throughout the process of relationship counseling, it’s also critical to remember that progress takes time and effort. It’s also important to stay committed to the process even when faced with setbacks or challenges along the way. With dedication and support from your qualified dating therapist at Looking Glass NYC, many individuals (and couples) are able to overcome their challenges and build stronger relationships based on mutual respect, trust, open communication, and, of course, fun!
Are you ready to enhance your romantic life? Invest in dating therapy, get un-stuck, and find a new way to optimize both your mental health and the way you interact with potential romantic partners. You are capable of achieving a deep, meaningful relationship in the heart of one of the world’s largest cities – and beyond – and we’re here to help you do it.
Deepen your relationship with yourself – and others – by making an investment in a dating therapist with Looking Glass NYC. Our team of experienced therapists is dedicated to helping you navigate the complexities of modern dating and relationships in New York (and beyond), so you can build strong connections that enrich your life and last.
Remember, change takes time. But with work and intention, you can overcome the challenges you face that keep you from developing meaningful relationships. Don’t let fear or uncertainty hold you back from the love and connection you deserve. Contact us today to schedule a consultation and take the first step toward building deeper, more fulfilling relationships.
FAQs
What should I expect from my first therapy session?
During your first session, your therapist will ask you questions to get to know you and understand your reasons for coming to therapy. Your therapist will want to learn about your history, what’s going on with you now, and learn about what you want to get out of therapy. You’ll also have the opportunity to ask them questions about how therapy works so you know what to expect.
How long will I be in therapy for?
The amount of time therapy takes is different for each person. If you’re dealing with a short-term stressor that you want resolved, that will typically take less time than a problem you’ve been dealing with for a long while. For some, therapy is short-term, taking just a few months until they are satisfied with their progress. For others, therapy will become a part of their routine, helping them manage ongoing concerns in their life and having a safe outlet for them to explore themselves, their patterns, and understand themselves on a deeper level.
Virtual therapy: How does it work?
With the rise in virtual therapy, it makes sense to want to know more about how it works. Research shows that virtual therapy has the same benefits as therapy that takes place face-to-face. Virtual therapy is an effective way to fit therapy into your busy schedule, as it allows you to talk to your therapist in the comfort of your own home. With virtual therapy, you avoid the hurdles that can happen with face-to-face appointments, such as scheduling conflicts, traffic, and travel time. In order to make the most of your virtual session, meet with your therapist in a private space in your home and have a good internet connection.
How do I pick the right therapist for me?
You’ve decided to take that next step and start therapy, and it can feel overwhelming to decide on a therapist. That’s why we offer a complimentary consultation call with a Looking Glass Intake Coordinator to help you make an informed choice. Every therapist has different strengths and styles that they bring to sessions. When you are in the process of selecting a therapist, talk to your coordinator about what you want to get out of therapy so you can rest assured that you are matched with the right person for you. After all, therapy is all about creating a space where you feel comfortable to open up, so finding a therapist that you click with is the first step on your journey!
How do I know if therapy is working?
Starting from your first session, you and your therapist will talk about what you want to get out of therapy. You may come in with a very specific goal or you may use therapy as a space to talk about ongoing events in your life. Regardless of your therapy goals, your therapist will create a comfortable space for you to talk about how therapy is going so you are both on the same page about the process. Ultimately, you will get more out of therapy if you are willing to put more into it. Growth takes place when you are willing to reflect on yourself and take what you are learning during sessions out into the world with you. Below are a few signs of progress that clients typically note:
- You start noticing that your symptoms (anxiety, depression, panic attacks, etc.) are less frequent or intense than before.
- You’re able to function better at work, school, or in your personal relationships.
- You start to find that you have a better understanding of yourself, your feelings, and your behaviors. You’ve gained insights and are making connections that you didn’t make before.
- You might be using new coping skills that you’ve learned in therapy and they’re helping in your daily life.
- People close to you may tell you that they have noticed positive changes.
Do you accept my health insurance?
Looking Glass Psychology is Out-of-Network with health insurances. If you have an Out-of-Network or PPO insurance plan, your insurance will refund a large portion of each session, as long as you have met your Out-of-Network deductible. After each appointment, we’ll supply you with a receipt called a superbill or reimbursement form. To submit for a partial refund, simply log into your health insurance portal to enter the information listed on your superbill. If you have an Out-of-Network plan and have met your Out-of-Network deductible, your health plan will mail the partial refund in the form of a check to your home a few weeks after each appointment. Questions? Email info@LookingGlassNYC.com or chat with us live during business hours by clicking the “Message Us” button on this page.
When can I book an appointment with you?
Your appointment request is our top priority, so we’ll get you on the schedule as soon as possible – no waitlists, and no hassle. Many of our clinicians offer both in-person and video appointments in the early morning, afternoon, late evening, or even weekends. To request an appointment, click the following link: https://lookingglassnyc.clientsecure.me or chat with us live during business hours by texting (646) 350-2202. Prefer a phone call? Contact us today by calling (646) 760-3399.